March 31, 2009

These Things Happened Last Night

One Tree Hill continued to invoke the name of it's most beloved former cast member - Jake! - without any sign of bringing that character back. Bastards!

Nathan dressed Jamie up as Kieth - complete with grease smudge mustache and goatee - while the brothers Scott reminisced with Jr. about a great-uncle he never knew. I'm pretty sure that was in the service of opening the door for the unemployed Lucas to re-open Keith's garage next season.

Peyton illustrated the rest of the history of her relationship with Lucas (that is the part she hadn't already illustrated while it was happening during the first 4 seasons) as a story for her future child she doesn't plan on being around to tell the old fashioned way. She is a massive freaking pessimist!

Brooke made the unbelievably bad decision not to tell Julian she loves him even though she totally does, after going to the airport to tell him in person that she made the good decision not to take her foster daughter out of school on a second's notice without the permission of the state authorities who placed said child in her care and move her across the country. It's a damn shame too because Austin Nichols was a beautiful addition the the cast.

Blaire and Nate made out at the duck pond - which totally explains the loaf of bread I could not understand from the picture - and decided that chemistry is not necessary to a relationship if you have a boring history and the lowered expectations of your future that come with either failing to get into the only college you applied to or finally giving in and becoming what your family wants you to be instead of what you want for yourself.

Serena heard what the theme was over on How I Met Your Mother last night and created a mental Murtaugh List of her own deciding she was "too old for this [high school] shit" and the friendship and boyfriend dramas that go along with teen-dom - first throwing a Sweet Sixteen party for Jenny that Jenny specifically said she didn't want, then acting petulant when more blame than was strictly due was assigned to her for the tragic turn the party took, and finally running off to Spain with Poppy Lifton and her skeevy boytoy and notifying her mother by text from the airport.

Dan got a fan letter from the contrivance, er, I mean kid that Rufus and Lily had 20 years ago but neither boy realized their connection.

Jenny reverted to her former Mean Girl glory temporarily.

And, most importantly, Vanessa finally gave in to her fate of totally being more like Blair than either of the girls could ever have realized when she schemed to be bitchy and make Nate and Blair jealous by making out with Chuck. When that didn't work and Nate called her on it, she had sex with Chuck! It was AWESOME!

Not quite so awesome? The news that Gossip Girl and One Tree Hill are taking a three-week hiatus after they only JUST came back with new episodes three weeks ago! WTF CW?

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